Ran across a log that got me thinking... and wanting to clarify my response. I did not carry over the whole log and all replies because I wanted to focus on mine; this is my personal log after all.
The two times I doubted my commitment were:1) When my captain was accused and convicted of criminal activity (I won't get into detail on it here), and we heard that he confessed "I'm guilty" after telling us for close to a year that he was innocent and it would all be made clear in time. I went to the sidewalk for him, protesting his innocence because he said he was and I wanted to believe him (and did). I couldn't see how a man with such composure, integrity and honor could be guilty of such accusations; when he changed his story in the courtroom I was devasted and gave serious thought to turning my back on the organization in distaste and crushed faith in my commanding officer.
2) I reconsidered my commitment when another man I hold in high regard was cast off because of simple words. There was so much undercurrent activity behind those words, but he was asking a question not name-calling at it was taken. Several others were punished for the incident, but this man took it to heart (and soul) and his punishment resulted in much more severe actions. It was years before he was redeemed, even after it was found that the other person had been calculating and attempting to destroy our org internally for some time. His punishment and the following duration of the punishment had me questioning my loyalty to this organization.
Both times were devastating to my psyche, and I gave serious consideration to walking away. But the force of friendship, sincerity and loyalty from everyone involved kept me here. The Federation is the growing embodiment of what could be right with the world, even as Gene Roddenberry saw it, and I want to be a part of the struggle to make it possible. If GR's vision is right, we'll have to hit rock bottom as a society before things will turn around - but it is my hope that with the Federation society as a whole won't actually find that rock-bottom but will crawl through near-bottom and climb with the strength of those in the Federation (and similarly-minded individuals) supporting society.